Last year's Christmas was cheerful, with sprinkles of sadness, like a mist fallen over Joy-town. It was one of the best Christmases I have ever had. This year's Christmas, I would like to call it a low-key Christmas due to the highs and lows experienced in family, finances, and career. I started this year with a fever and cold, spending New Year's Day in bed. I remember having an awful sore throat. The highlight of January was a bike accident where I fairly escaped death on a main road, surrounded by loving and kind people. This year marked my realization that I felt more like an adult, knowing what to say and what not to, like how I hid the accident from my parents to avoid worrying them.
I also took the courageous step of going on a trip without my parents, siblings, or teachers. It was a journey where I had to deal with problems on my own and work out the funding math, saving up with a happy spirit. My sister graduated from 10th grade and took her first step toward her career in accounting. I was there at her graduation, helping her select her graduation saree and ornaments, doing her makeup. It felt like my own kid was graduating, given our 10-year age gap. This year, I felt closer to my brother, sharing moments of sibling love and care, going for lunches, brunches, and coffee dates.
This year brought the realization that parents are human beings, and it's normal to fail at certain aspects. None of us will ever be perfect parents; we are all trying, learning, and adapting. No hard feelings on the family front. Learning from our parents is crucial. I realized that things become simpler when you accept the situation rather than asking "Why?" when there's no clear answer. "Pause and Breathe" is good advice, and "This too shall pass" is a wise acknowledgment that has helped me through haunting complexities.
The highs of this year were like a sugar rush, but the lows were tears filled with pure gloom. I celebrated Onam on a journey from Bangalore to Pondy, living a perfect life in a homestay with the attractions of French town, the taste of salt in the air from the sea breeze, and great company. Then, reality hit when I returned to Bangalore, work, and familiarity, making life mundane again. Diwali celebrations followed, with moments of work review, comparisons with colleagues, and finding hardships and obstacles at work, feeling like rocks weighing me down.
Acceptance became a great key to self-love and happiness in terms of work. Rejected CVs and unheard calls put a pin on major life decisions requiring significant financial support. Adulthood is liberating; living with the money you earn is scary, but you are your own boss during non-working hours. This year taught me the value of regret, learning to be yourself, akin to learning to surf—finding balance, going with the flow, and dealing with troubling moments. This Christmas, I put up our Christmas tree at home, did a bit of DIY, brought scented candles in October, and tried aroma reading. I decided to keep the glitter of social media glamour away and embrace the sparkle of life by being as real as possible. I'm reusing the Pondy trip dress for Christmas day, aiming to be like a wise dark green tree. A perfect Christmas midnight mass, wine, plum cake, stories, and comfy series/movies will complete this beautiful Christmas, looking forward to the next year with dreams and hopes.
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